Hi! Now Take Off Your Skin Part III: The Cheese Strikes Back

     Horror films are a rite of passage. It’s kind of like sex. We always remember our first and always complain about the worst we ever had. I love a good slasher flick. The original Black Christmas, Slumber Party Massacre, and of course the very odd Sleepaway Camp.

      When my brother gave me this box set I just figured I’d plow through the movies and have a bit of a laugh. I have made it through 4 and that may be too many.  Horror has a rich and vibrant history. The Wolfman, The Invisible Man. These are movies that serve as a gateway drug to full blown horror.

     Once I saw a horror movie high. I think it was the best and worst idea we had ever had. Smoke some pot and see a horror film. What did we see?

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     This is not a movie you want to see high on pot. It really freaked me out and I have yet to see it again. When you see a movie like this high it sucks you in and you can’t really do a whole lot but go; “Woah!” If I see it straight it could totally suck and ruin what I thought was an awesome movie.

     You couldn’t pay me to get high and watch the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I’d shit myself. As soon as he comes running out with that chainsaw the poops would leave my butt. I couldn’t watch a movie like Friday 13th high either. It would freak me out too much.

      Despite feeling a little sick I did manage to make it through two more movies. These were done by the same director so I figured why not lump them together.
               

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     The

Gorehouse Greats Collection has let me down once before. Blood Mania was pretty terrible but Nightmare In Wax was pretty decent. So how did Terror rate?

     Given the title I was expecting terror but what we have is a British slasher hybrid that drags on and on. It’s a tale of revenge that keeps you guessing until the big reveal at the the end. Quite a bit of blood and a chick actually gets impaled on a tree! Not bad for a film from 1978.

      The film itself hasn’t been remastered but it is in widescreen format. There are scenes that are too dark to see anything and some of the chase scenes drag on too long. If it was done to create tension it failed. I wanted to see mayhem and blood and while I sort of got it it just wasn’t enough.

      The main problem was the story. It just kind of lurched along and any time someone was killed there was that glimmer of hope that it would pick up. Based on the kills I would probably watch it again and would recommend because of the genre that was to come.

      Ok so it took me a couple of days to watch Terror. I kept getting interrupted and the select a scene doesn’t exactly put you where you were. I kept jumping around trying to figure out where the hell I was. Not cool Millcreek. Why not put in more than 4 options?

                  

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      How do you evolve horror films? We insert Satan. This seemed promising especially when Dio makes an appearance

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       Wait, that’s not Dio, my bad. This was the big opening scene complete with the hot naked chick being sacrificed. There is a lot of nudity but it’s in the context of an attempted rape and a naked chick tied to a tree, branded with a cross, and whipped. You thought your day sucked?

      If you read the blurb on the back of the case the story is about a family that goes to visit an uncle, car going ten miles an hour putters into a tree and then explodes. Come to find out the Uncle wants to sacrifice their niece to some dead chick.

     Kind of interesting but moves like a snail. Not much on horror at all but if you like films that deal with Satan have at it. Keep in mind it’s not all full blown Satan just a creepy uncle who worships Satan.

     The one part that makes this movie is the roof top fall. When the dummy hits the ground it looks like a cake the Cake Boss would make. There’s cherry filling for the arm and mmmmm vanilla frosting for God knows what.

     So these two films showed promise. While I could do less with the slow pace of the film the parts that featured gore were well done. Would I watch them again? If I were high maybe

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