Home sweet home?

     When my wife and I split up I was ok with staying with my parents for a week until my housing came through. If your marriage falls apart and you move back home with your parents for longer than than that you can forget about having a normal life or even getting over the fact that you’re now single. It speaks volumes about your mental state and I guess it’s ok to stay longer than a week but once you get comfortable you aren’t going anywhere.

     Some people just can’t afford to move out. This economy is a mother fucker and there are quite a few people who are stuck at home because they lost their job and they’re stuck. It happens a lot and if you have the option of living with your mom or even your grandma until you get on your feet then do it. No one wants to be a hobo. Hobos drink a lot and smell like puke and shit. Sometimes they smell like the inside of a porta potty at a Phish concert.

     I had a lot to prove to myself when we split up. I wanted to be able to stand on my own two feet and show my wife that I could survive on my own and for a year I did. I had finally hit a point in which life was fun. I had my own house. Unlike a lot of people whose marriages implode I didn’t crawl into a corner I remained strong and refused to let my situation kick my ass.

After the fire I assumed that I would move back home for a couple months but the  job I had wasn’t paying enough and I kept losing hours. When they closed I wasn’t at all saddened by it. Just forged ahead and refused to be beaten. I had gotten my ass kicked by life so many times nothing really surprises me. It kicks my ass, I spit out some some blood and get the fuck up and swing right back.

     My two months have turned into a year and there is a great deal I miss about living in my own place. The privacy is a given but there is that ability to have days where it’s totally acceptable to not do a damn thing. I miss strolling around naked just to get a drink from the kitchen. I haven’t done that in a year. I used to sleep naked once in awhile not because I enjoyed it but as a married man and a father with kids in the house shit like that would traumatize the children.

     Just for shits and giggles I used to tuck my dick in and do my Buffalo Bill impersonation. I would fuck me, and yes I would fuck me hard. Without the privacy I used to have I can’t even bring a woman home to have sex with. Do you have any idea how awkward it would be if I were balls deep in a chick and my mom walks in? That’s a relationship that would end quickly. I would even get to finish fucking her.

     I need my own space. A place to put my books and just a place that is all mine. A place where I can sleep naked and just stay on the couch all day. I hate people who can  do that. You are all bastards that I envy. So today I started making phone calls and even managed to look at a place. It’s time to move out. Now the fun here is going to be blogging about these places.

   I think my blog has gotten a little weak since my house fire but I have a feeling that soon my life will be chock full of insanity and that was where I drew a lot of my material. Life should be embraced and sometimes it’s ok to laugh at ourselves. What other choice do we have? Question is am I ready for it.

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