Confessions Of A Hair Metal Addict

If Legacy or any of my books got turned into a movie I would request that the soundtrack consist of hair metal. I think horror and hair metal would go great together and if the movie was a hit I could be responsible for it’s return! I have been waiting for hair metal to make a comeback and it just hasn’t done it yet. It will though. I want to led a scruffy band of soldiers carrying kegs of beer and while being followed by chicks in leather mini skirts. For those who don’t know what I’m babbling about here’s the definition of hair metal; Glam metal (also known as hair metal, sleaze metal and often used synonymously with pop metal) is a subgenre of hard rock and heavymetal. It combines elements of those genres with punk rock and pop music, adding catchy hooks and guitar riffs, while borrowing from the fashion of 1970s glam rock.

I miss the sleaze! Am I the only one that still listens to Ratt and Winger?? While I write this I’m listening to Firehouse’s Hold Your Fire which isn’t as good as the debut record, but still it had some chops. firehouse.jpg

I can tell you exactly where I was the first time I saw Tawny Kitaen dancing on the hood of that car. The chick on the cover of Ratt’s Invasion Of Your Privacy video was hot as fuck. As a kid growing up during that era I was fortunate to see some sleazy chicks and I  I loved it!!!!

tumblr_static_tumblr_lw2jd9ppxg1r7iyfmo1_250        tumblr_myspv0g2iZ1tooympo1_500

R-581831-1360858395-2470.jpeg

I think most of all this was a form of music that had no real rules. The lyrics were juvenile and for a kid like me I just wanted something that I could listen to and just be goofy. Hair metal was exactly what I needed and even as an adult I can play a certain album and it takes me back to those long ass summer vacations. I would blow my allowance on books and music. It reminds me of a time when everything was possible and yes, it reminds me of those chicks. The ones being squirted with fire hoses and wearing short leather mini skirts and heels. Women like that didn’t exist in my neighborhood!  I did find out that those women didn’t really exist and most women found hair metal sexist but who the fuck cared about those stuck up bitches!

I may be getting older but hair metal reminds me of a time when I didn’t have all the answers. While I do listen to newer music from time to time it just doesn’t have the same energy that hair metal did. There’s also a personal connection to it. I can relate to hair metal because I remember feeling that no one listened to me and all I wanted to do was have a good time. I like a song that is full of sexual innuendos. I can’t relate to newer music because it lacks any originality and for the most part it’s all whiny bullshit. I want songs about sex and partying. I want a piece of cherry pie, and I wanna rock. Can we bring back the sleaze? Can we bring back the chicks getting squirted with fire hoses??

If I had to recommend some hair metal I would tell you to start with some classics. Mötley’s Shout At The Devil, Ratt’s first four albums. Cellar, Invasion, and Undercover, and yes, even the E.P.. I would also tell you to listen to L.A. Guns’ debut album along with Hurricane’s Over The Edge. Those are the albums I listen to a lot and as for bands you can’t go wrong with Twisted Sister, or Hericane Alice. I think Kix’s Blow My Fuse and Hot Wire were brilliant. The music from that era has a timelessness to it and some may not have aged well but some did, and you can roll your eyes at me when I listen to Wildside or XYZ, and that’s okay. I am immersed in a time when I was young and the world was a wide mysterious place full of possibilities. There were also scantily clad women wearing leather skirts and heels. That’s not a bad thing.  1058514-lita_ford.jpg

It’s going to make a comeback and I can smile and say I told you so. Will it be as awesome as the first wave? All I know is that I’ll be able to say I told you so. I love being right. You can deny it all you want but I’m telling you. There will be a hair metal resurgence. It’ll be interesting to see how well it does in this ultra P.C. conform or die era, but I think there’s always room for a little sleaze.

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s