This is an open letter to all my Christian friends who have by now assumed that I have gone totally crazy. I realize how random my behavior has been over the last year and maybe it’s time I come clean.
I should be honest with all of you and even myself. My blog is all about being honest and open and holding nothing back. After careful consideration and thought I felt now was the time to be honest.
Due to a variety of personal tragedies I have become a borderline atheist. God hasn’t been there at all and the two years I wasted praying and believing got me nowhere. It’s funny how people tell you to trust in God and I found that the more I did the more I got shit on.
What’s amusing to me is that as soon as I walked away from religion my life improved. I have a job working well over eighty hours a week and I didn’t pray and ask for God’s help. If I had I’d probably still be unemployed. I started relying on my self and it started working better than when I relied on God.
The thing is I don’t even think there is a God. Forget all the science and other bullshit. This is strictly on an intellectual level. I stopped believing in God and my life improved. I found that my personal happiness was far more important than the approval of some nonexistent deity.
I hear the questions. How can you walk away from your faith? You know the Bible, you know you’re going to hell right? I walked away from my faith a year ago when my house burnt down. That was the nail in my Christian coffin. It was quite easy to denounce everything I once held dear.
You can live without God. I have never been happier and I am proof that you can be a borderline atheist. God was never there for me so it made more sense to live as I wanted and to be happy. Happiness isn’t tied to religion. So many people think it is and they are totally wrong.
Even though I’m a borderline atheist it doesn’t mean I’m an evil person. I’m just no longer narrow minded and base my opinions on what will benefit society as a whole and not on what will cripple us. Where as Christians throw God everywhere and it always always ends disastrously.
I don’t plan on announcing my decision repeatedly so you won’t see me arguing with anyone or trying to shove my ideas down any one’s throat. My choices are personal as are everyone else’s. I don’t want to argue and don’t really give a shit what you believe as long as you leave me the fuck alone.
It is possible to be in love and live a normal life. I don’t question the why of it all or even where it all came from. When I’m dead it doesn’t matter anyway. I’ll be lying in a coffin rotting so wasting my time pleasing a God who may not exist seems like a waste of time.
I felt that I should be honest and I hope that people don’t feel compelled to pray for me or send me their testomony on why they need God. I’ve been there and done that and I am now focusing on living my life the way I want to. I am no longer blinded by the God delusion so it’s easier to find inner peace and happiness.